thoughts

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I just got back from Mangalore on sunday. My entire family went for the annual Kola organised by my father's family on their ancestral farm lands in Belle. People belonging to my father's household come from all parts of India. It's one big festival.I find it difficult to explain what a Kola is. It's sort of a dance/drama form in honour of the ghost gods or bhutas. But it's also mixedwith ancient traditions where people actually belive the dancer is possesed by the bhuta and worship him. There's a lot of dialogue between the dancer/actor and a representative of the household. My tulu is not good enough to understand most of what was said between them,but primarily it looked like the representative was asking the bhuta for the well being of the family. The bhuta spoke a lot, but I'm not sure of anything he said. Either way, it was an interesting experience. I've never seen a complete Kola before - it starts late at night and goes on till after sunrise.

I'm into my last 5 weeks at Honeywell. I don't think it has struck me yet that afterMay I will no longer be associated to this office. I can't believe I've been here for5 1/2 years. It feels strange. I've never been attached to one place for so long. All my life I've always moved on to something else every 3 to 4 years. Sometimes it wasfrom one city to another and other times from one school or college to the next. I'm completely surprised I lasted so long at Honeywell. I didn't even expect to get hired.I thought my incompetency would surface soon and I would be asked to leave. But I guessI was wrong. Either I'm a better employee than I think I am or Honeywell does not care aboutthe people it hires. I'm inclined to the former. Now that I'm leaving on my own accord, I wonder how I will feel on my last day. Being used to moving on, I guess it will be the usual mixed emotions. Both a bit of sadness about leaving a place that has become my second...

"HASH INCLUDE S-T-D-I-O-DOT-H," said Prof. Virupaksha. I remember thinking to myself, if on reaching home my mother asked me what I learnt in college, and if I had repeated "HASH INCLUDE S-T-D-I-O-DOT-H", she would have slapped me thinkingI was saying a bad word! (though sometimes when I'm angry, I do mutter it at people...." HASH INCLUDE S-T-D-I-O DOT H YOU!!!"). Thus started my introduction to software programming....and my life long aversion to it. By qualification I'm supposed to be an engineer who majored in computer science. By ability, I'm niether. I can't fix an engine and I'm not smarter than a 5th grader when it comes to computers. How I've survived 5 and 1/2 years as a so called "software engineer" amazes me. ....or rather scares me! The world looks at us for software and if engineers like me are providing their needs, god help us all. To give you an idea...I work on aerospace software ..and I refuse to fly.......

I wish I had spent more effort developing my writing skills after 10th grade. Unfortunately I always felt my language underwent gradual degredation since then. But I like writing. I'm not a very creative person but I'd like to be. I hope with time I'd be able to write something that is actually nice to read. My attempts at literary immortality are at http://chetanwritesstories.blogspot.com

For train travellers, the term side upper should ring a bell. It refers to what I consider the most uncomfortable berth in a second class sleeper compartment. And yet it is also the most profound. The discomfort of being stuck in a berth that's too small, too hot and too high does not allow you to do anything constructive other than philosophize life. Side Upper represents a lot of situations that life puts us in. My thoughts on some of them are at http://sideupper.blogspot.com/

It's almost 2:00am. I'm working the night shift at office. I've got about 6 more weeks of work left. In september of last year I started applying to colleges abroad for admission into their respective MBA programs. I had to tell my boss then since he had to write recommendations for me. That was my first step into the unknown. Once I dicussed my plans with my boss I knew there was no going back. I would have to leave. It was a scary feeling. What if I didn't get in anywhere? What would I do then? Would I be able to find another job if required? But somewhere deep inside I knew I had to take that step. Fortunately scores of essays, 2 rejects and 4 1/2 months later I finally got a mail from a university I had interviewed with....."Dear Chetan.....We believe that your background to date would make you an excellent member of the MBA class. We will therefore be offering you an unconditional place on the programme.......". It was the first time in months I felt ha...